Why You're Finally Trusting Your Instincts Again After Narcissistic Abuse

 The Heart of The Soojz Project

The Soojz Project was created to bridge the gap between "knowing" you are safe and actually "feeling" safe. For many of us, our value was long tied to how much pressure we could absorb and how well we could brace for the next impact. When that impact finally stops, the nervous system doesn't always know how to transition into peace.


It wasn't until I picked up my Daegeum and started creating that I realized my instincts weren't broken—they were just buried under layers of someone else's noise.

  1. Sound: My album, Heavy Bamboo Rain, uses 528Hz frequencies to clear that "mental static" so you can finally hear the quiet whisper of your own truth.

  2. Insight: Through Recovering Me, we dismantle the lies that made you doubt your own eyes and ears.

  3. Action: My coloring affirmations book, Speak Love to Yourself, is a training ground for intuition. Every color you choose is a small, safe practice in trusting your own taste.



A realistic photo of a woman holding a compass and a coloring book in a bright, sunlit room. She is smiling peacefully, symbolizing the return of her intuition and the ability to trust her instincts after narcissistic abuse recovery.
You aren't "guessing"; you are remembering. 🕊️🌿 Your intuition never left you; it was just waiting for the noise to stop. Trust the pull.


Why You're Finally Trusting Your Instincts Again After Narcissistic Abuse

Do you remember the moment you first doubted yourself? It probably wasn't a big event. It was likely a small moment where you saw something "off," and the narcissist told you that you were "crazy," "imagining things," or "insecure." Over hundreds of these micro-moments, you learned to outsource your reality to them. You stopped checking your internal compass because it always seemed to point in a direction they didn't like.

But lately, that compass has started to spin again. You meet someone, and you feel that familiar "pull" in your solar plexus—and this time, you don't ignore it. You are trusting your instincts after narcissistic abuse, and it feels both terrifying and electric.

Today, I want to share why your intuition is coming back and how to nurture this new, diamond-sharp clarity.


Read more  Who Am I When No One Is Watching Me?


1. The Fog of Gaslighting is Lifting

Gaslighting is a psychological fog machine. Its entire purpose is to make you doubt your own perception so that the narcissist can become the sole arbiter of truth. When you go No Contact or set firm boundaries, you stop breathing in that fog.

As the air clears, you realize that you were never "confused"—you were just being lied to. The "strangeness" you felt during the relationship wasn't a lack of intuition; it was your intuition trying to save you from a distorted reality. You are finally trusting yourself again because you’ve realized that your "first thought" was almost always the right one.

2. Reconnecting the "Gut-Brain" Axis

In my journey, I learned that intuition isn't just a "vibe"—it’s a biological fact. Your Enteric Nervous System (the "brain in your gut") sends more signals to your head than the other way around. Narcissistic abuse causes a "disconnection" where we learn to ignore these somatic signals to survive.

[Image: Diagram of the Vagus Nerve connecting the gut and the brain]

Through the grounding work of Heavy Bamboo Rain, you are literally repairing the wiring of your Vagus nerve. When your body feels safe, the "gut feelings" become loud and clear again. You aren't "guessing" anymore; you are resonating. If a person or situation feels "heavy," "sharp," or "cold," you trust that somatic data without needing a 10-page list of "logical" reasons.

3. From "Over-Explaining" to "Internal Knowing"

I used to think that to trust my instincts, I had to be able to prove them to others. I would JADE (Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain) my gut feelings until I was blue in the face.

The biggest shift in my recovery was realizing that "I just don't feel right about this" is a complete sentence. You are finally trusting your instincts because you’ve stopped looking for external consensus. You no longer need the narcissist—or anyone else—to agree with your gut for it to be true. This is the ultimate act of self-sovereignty.

4. The Sovereignty of Small Choices

Rebuilding trust in yourself starts small. This is why I created Speak Love to Yourself. When you are coloring, there is no "wrong" choice. If your instinct says "use blue," and you use blue, you are reinforcing a neural pathway that says: I had an impulse, I followed it, and the world didn't end.

These micro-moments of trusting your instincts build the "muscle" you need for the big life decisions. You are training your brain to remember that you are a reliable source of information.

5. Recognizing "Glimmers" as Well as Red Flags

Trusting your instincts isn't just about spotting danger; it's about spotting safety. After abuse, we are hyper-aware of "Red Flags." But as you heal, you start to notice "Glimmers"—those tiny moments of genuine peace, consistency, and warmth.

You are finally trusting your instincts because you can now feel the difference between the "anxious high" of a trauma bond and the "warm calm" of a healthy connection. You are moving from a life of "avoiding pain" to a life of "seeking peace."


Visit Soojz | The Mind Studio


Conclusion: The Return of the North Star

At The Soojz Project, we believe that your intuition is your North Star. It may have been obscured by the storm of narcissistic abuse, but it never actually went out. In my life, walking away from the "logic" of a corporate career to pursue the "feeling" of healing music was the ultimate act of trusting my instincts. It was scary, it was misunderstood by many, and it was the best decision I ever made.

If you are starting to hear that quiet voice inside you again, listen to it. Don't ask for permission. Don't look for evidence. Just follow the pull. You have survived the storm, and you are finally home. The compass is in your hands now. Where do you want to go?


The Soojz Project Ecosystem

  • Recovering Me: Reclaiming your reality and dismantling the mechanics of gaslighting.

  • Not Just Me: Real talk about the road back from anxiety and the return of self-trust.

  • Heal.Soojz.com: The home of Soojz Mind Studio. Here you’ll find "Heavy Bamboo Rain" (528Hz music) and "Speak Love to Yourself" (coloring affirmations) to help ground your returning intuition.


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